Family Dove Hunting Outing

One of the reasons we got Lily last year was so Nate could train her and take her bird hunting. This year is the first opportunity he has gotten to actually take her out in the field. We are fortunate to live close to fields suitable for dove hunting so Nate doesn't have to take a long weekend trip just to bird hunt. (He is saving all those weekends for deer season!) He decided to take Lily out this evening, so Luke, Daisy and I decided to tag along.

We all wore camoflage hats - Luke's was a little too big but he liked being like Daddy and Mommy.




Luke's favorite part was "walking" Daisy.


I love how Daisy is looking at Luke in this one - it's the first picture I have where Daisy looks like she might even like him!


So excited!


The excursion was not all smiles for our drama king.


Now let's get down to business. Lily and Nate watching for the birds.


We didn't see very many, but Nate did end up shooting one. Unfortunately it landed behind us so Lily didn't see it fall. Here's Nate directing her where to retrieve the bird.


Hitting a point when she found the bird - so cool!!


We were both proud of Lily considering it was only the second time she'd been out hunting and the first time Nate had actually been able to shoot a bird. Once he killed that one, he used it to train her. I had to hold her at heel and then he would throw the bird, shoot the gun, and I would yell for her to "go fetch!" Then she would take off and immediately go right for the bird and bring it back. She tried to bring it to me at first, but I ran off screaming in the opposite direction so she caught on to take it to Nate! (I don't do dead things!!)

So that was our family dove hunting outing. One thing that struck me as odd is whenever Nate would shoot his gun, I would jump. Luke, however, was totally unfazed by the whole process. And he's mister freak out at loud noises! I guess he was born to hunt...sigh.

Write your plans in pencil...

...but give God the eraser. This is something I constantly have to remind myself.

It's really no secret that we are ready for another baby. We are ready for two kids, we are ready for Luke to have a sibling and be a big brother. We are ready to begin that chapter in our life.

We were thrilled to find out that we were expecting on September 2nd. We were cautiously optimistic that our second baby would be born in May 2010, and we were excited about the possibility.

However, God had another plan for us and I miscarried the baby on September 17. I would have been 5 weeks and 6 days, which is exactly how far along I was with our last pregnancy when I miscarried. I don't really know why I can't seem to make it past 6 weeks in a pregnancy.

I'm not going to lie and say that I am doing okay. This has absolutely devastated me. I know that everything happens for a reason, and that God has a plan for me and my family, but right now that fact just isn't comforting me like it should. I am in the mourning phase of the process - mourning the little baby that I will not get to know or hold, the little baby that I will not be able to kiss on his/her forehead and tell him/her just how much I love him/her. This little baby won't get to know his/her big brother, or get so excited to see his/her Daddy when he gets home from work.

The thing that has really been bothering me is I want to know what my two angels look like in Heaven. I know I will see them one day - but what will they look like? Will they know that I am their mommy, that they come from me? Will I recognize them as my children, the children I never got to know? My father-in-law gave me the most comforting answer - that we don't know what exactly they will look like, but I will recognize them just like the 12 disciples knew Jesus when he came back from the dead.

Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and he shall direct your paths.
Proverbs 3: 5-6

I am probably one of the world's most impatient people. I hate waiting, I like instant results and knowing right now what is going to happen tomorrow. I like to plan in advance. My in laws are notorious for flying by the seat of their pants, and while it drives me crazy, I know that God has placed them in my life for a reason. Because of them, I am learning that not everything has to be perfectly planned out. I am learning that I have to be okay with not knowing what is going to happen tomorrow, or next week, or next year. I am learning to have faith in God's plan for me. Because the plans I make for myself are irrelevant.

My brethren, count it all joy when you fall into various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience. But let patience have it's perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing. If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him. But let him ask in faith, with no doubting, for he who doubts is like a wave of the sea driven and tossed by the wind. Let not that man supposed that he will receive anything from the Lord, he is a double-minded man, unstable in all his ways.
James 1:2-8

Thursday morning Nate asked me to memorize this verse. Our pastor had preached over it the previous Sunday, and I did not realize at the time just what this verse would mean to me during this time. It speaks to me and where I am in my life and where I am in my faith. My prayer during this time is that I learn from this experience and that I come away from this second miscarriage more mature. Because life is not all sunshine and roses, bad stuff happens and it's how we deal with the bad stuff that shapes us as people. God puts us through trials, yes, but each trial is a blessing if we learn from it. I hope that one day I can look back at my second miscarriage as a blessing. I am nowhere near that yet (considering it was two days ago) but I know I will get there.

"Bring me joy, bring me peace, bring the chance to be free, bring me anything that brings You glory. But I know there'll be days when this life brings me pain, but if that's what it takes to praise You, Jesus bring the rain." -Bring the Rain by Mercy Me

I heard this song today and obviously it spoke to me as well. Because God does great things in our lives, He is so good, and I will walk through the pouring rain just to experience the sunshine that He brings. Right now the sunshine I am clinging to is my wonderful husband and my precious boy (they are just the best things in the world, I am so thankful for them), both of our families, our friends, our church, where we live, Nate's job...there are just so many blessings in our life. I truly believe that one day we will have another child, but in God's time. He's just not ready for that to happen yet. But I have faith that it will...eventually.

A Trip to the Dallas Zoo

Nate took his birthday off so we wanted to do something special as a family. We had been given free tickets to the Dallas Zoo so we thought that would be a perfect outing. We woke up Friday morning to overcast skies, but decided to go anyway and pray that the rain would hold off until we were done.

We all had a lot of fun together, but honestly the Dallas Zoo just does not compare to the Fort Worth Zoo. But for what it cost us (a mere $7 parking plus a couple drinks because I left our water bottles at home), it was perfect. It was not crowded at all, in fact I think we saw maybe 20 other people the whole time we were there, it was overcast so it was not hot (just humid!), and we got to spend a few hours together as a family, with no distractions (except for the few calls Nate got on his work phone).

Luke was in heaven - he loved seeing all of the animals. One of his favorite movies is "Madagascar" and he was so excited that the lemur exhibit was right when we walked into the zoo. The lemur is who sings "I like to move it, move it" in Madagascar and Luke LOVES that part of the movie. In fact, he only knows the movie as "Move It".


We headed over to the north part of the zoo first. I was very excited to see the flamingos, though! I have pictures as a kid standing in this very spot, on one leg, pretending to be a flamingo. I tried to get Luke to do the same thing, but he would not cooperate.


The next exhibit was the eagles, including a bald eagle. There is a Little Einsteins episode where a bald eagle steals Leo's baton so Luke was psyched to see a real live bald eagle. I was very impressed, we didn't even have to tell him what it was, he just knew.


After the eagles we saw the Galapagos tortoises. I couldn't believe how big these things are!


Now at the elephants. I kept trying to get Luke to look at me and smile, but the best I could get was him looking somewhere else and saying "cheese".


On to the giraffes. Luke was excited to see "Melman" (another Madagascar character).




Nate and his mini-me.


Luke and me by the tortoise statue.


Nate and Luke laughing at the iguanas. Something about the word "iguana" makes Luke giggle every time he hears it.


Going into the white alligator exhibit. Those things were creeeeepy!!




Walking around the reptile exhibit, Luke was laughing at this crazy lizard trying to swim.


On to the monkeys! They were sleepy at this moment, but we walked back by them and they were going insane. More on that later!


Lazy kangaroo.


We had to walk up a hill from the kangaroos to the rhinoceroses and Luke took off running ahead of us. We both stopped to just watch him and when he turned around to see us just standing at the bottom, he yelled, "COME ON!!!"


Luke got the best seat in the house - here he is directing Nate to "go that way."


Looking at the rhinoceroses.


Cheeeeese!!


I LOVE this picture of Nate and Luke. In my opinion, it totally captures the love and adoration that Luke feels for his daddy.


Okay, more on the crazy monkeys. We had to walk back by them to get to the main part of the zoo, and before we got there we could hear this sound that we couldn't place. At first I thought it was a siren, then a train whistle, then a kid squealing. As we got closer, we realized it was the monkeys!! They were swinging all around and calling to each other. It was insane and hilarious, I wish I'd brought the video camera. At one point they stopped, and Luke said, "Oh, no, monkeys go?" That's right when I snapped this picture:


After we finished up at the north part of the zoo, we stopped for a drink and then went over to the Wilds of Africa exhibit. Not very wild, but whatever. There were no lions, zebras, or hippos! Luke kept asking for "Alex", "Marty", and "Gloria" (again, Madagascar).

We had to walk down some stairs - here is Luke being a typical boy.
Oh, look, a puddle of water!


I think I will jump in it!


There was a ruler next to the African penguins where you could see if you're taller than a penguin.


I really think Luke is saying "I'm taller than this penguin"


"and this one, too!"


Then we got to this feisty gorilla. He was sitting with his back to us, eating the bark off the tree, and I took a picture of him:


He then looked back at me and got up to show me his good side. He would not move, so Nate told me to take another picture. So I did:


And then he turned around and faced us to continue eating his bark. Just what I like, a gorilla with a sense of humor.


We found another gorilla sitting by the window and tried to get Luke to take a picture next to him. Luke wanted to get as far way from him as possible.


So Nate tried to show him that the gorilla wouldn't get him.


Luke still wanted nothing to do with it. But Nate and the gorilla seemed to have good conversation.


Luke and the Nile crocodile. Something else from Little Einsteins.


Daddy's little copycat.


Luke loved this baboon. He said, "Look, baboon, a tree!" and pointed to the tree. The baboon totally turned it's head to look at it!


Luke found a stick while we were walking back to the front of the zoo. Honestly, I think this might have been the highlight of the day for him.


For the last picture, I wanted Luke to sit next to the elephant fountain. He did not enjoy that. But he stayed still long enough for me to snap a couple pics.

Happy Birthday, Daddy/Nate!!

Today is Nate's 29th birthday! One year away from the big 3-0!!

We are so fortunate to have Nate as our husband/daddy. He works so hard and does so much for our family. We are so grateful, even though we probably don't show it enough. And by we, I really mean me, because all you have to do is look at the way Luke looks at his daddy. It's obvious that Daddy really is Luke's hero.

Happy Birthday to the best husband and daddy! We love you very much!


Luke was so excited to have Daisy on eye level.


Giving Daisy pats.


Finally saying cheese!

Luke's 1st Day at School

Luke had a great first day at school. On the way to the church we talked about all the fun things he would get to do and how much fun he would have. I was very proud of him that he walked in to church by himself without having me hold him - although I was carrying all of his stuff so I couldn't have held him even if he'd wanted me to! We made it back to his classroom and I showed him the basket where we would put his backpack, his lunch box, and his nap mat. Then we walked into his classroom.

There were a few kids in the class and his teachers were blowing bubbles for them to play with. Luke was very interested in the bubbles but he didn't want me to leave his side. I just have him a hug, told him that I love him, reminded him to tell his teachers when he needed to potty, and got up to leave. He started grabbing for me so one of his teachers grabbed him and I left the room.

I walked up to the front to pay the tuition and then I realized that I had forgotten to sign him in at the classroom. There is a sign in sheet outside the room where we sign them in and provide a number where we can be reached during the day. By the time I got back to his classroom, he was jumping around trying to get the bubbles. I managed to make it to the car before I burst into tears.

While he was in class I went grocery shopping all by myself! I forgot how easy it is to get groceries without a kid tagging along. However, when I got to the store, I went around and opened Luke's door and was surprised that he wasn't in his carseat.

I did get a call from the school around noon that Luke didn't want to lay down on his nap mat. They wanted to know what they should do to get him to lay down and relax. I gave them some ideas - tell him that it's time to lay down, remind him that Jamie made it for him to sleep on at school, make sure he has his paci and blankie, maybe rub his back - and told them that if he didn't lay down that I would come and get him. I got another call a few minutes later asking if he had a new paci because he was looking at it like he hadn't seen it before, but it was the one I had gotten out of his bed that morning. I didn't get another call so I got there a little before 2:30 to pick him up.

When I got there, he was sitting in the floor playing with a toy. He was very excited to see me and I picked him up to give him a hug. He just kept saying, "Hi, Mommy" and putting his head on my shoulder - I could tell that he had missed me! His teachers said that he did very well. They had music class and Stretch n Grow and he had a stamp on each of his hands, and he was very proud of them. He was also in the same clothes that he went in that morning so that meant no accidents! However, he hadn't actually gone to the bathroom at school (except in his Pull Up at naptime) so I don't really know what we're going to do about that one.

I am so relieved that he had a good first day. I hope that tomorrow and the rest of the days go smoothly, too.

Here is my big boy on his first day of school:


Out in front of church - I'm pretty sure he was tired of me taking pictures of him!